The End is Near (or is it?)

 Apparently I have about a month left in this pregnancy.

 This morning I managed to squish my little water filled potato sacks (more commonly known as feet) into the biggest sandals I could find. They will not come off until the end of the day because if I unwedge them, I am guaranteed to never get them back on. 
I am trying to come up with a name for the maneuver that I’ve recently devised for getting into my vehicle without ripping my pelvis in two. Suggestions are always appreciated. 
I wait with wanting anticipation after each Braxton-hicks contraction for another to follow, preferably within 5 minutes. I am sadly disappointed when they rarely come. The most painful ones are my favourite, as they seem more promising. 
I daydream about the best places for my water to break. In my car or in my bed are my least dreamt of places – only because then I have to clean up after myself. I’m not sure where the best place would be. 
“You dropped what on the floor and you want me to pick it up?” That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard all day – funnier than the production titled “applying compression stockings,” which you all missed while you were still sleeping. 
I realize I make look like I’m “ready to pop.” I assure you that I do, infact, still have a month to go. Please don’t remind me of how impossibly big I look. 
No wonder the last month of pregnancy seems to go on forever!

7 thoughts on “The End is Near (or is it?)

  1. My own foxling was exactly 2 weeks overdue… cheeky thing! I hate to admit, the thing that FINALLY got my labour moving along was placing my mini trampoline at the bottom of the staircase and bouncing for 3 hours. My sister is certain that the weight of my size GINORMOUS tummy is what finally caused my water to rupture, lo. =)

    My rotten little one arrived at the exact time my induction was scheduled, at 2:30 in the afternoon. She is still in possession of the same wicked sense of humor… gods help me.

    Best of luck with this one, Aggie my dear! =)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So true! Time really is relative, huh? I have a theory – the reason why we’re so uncomfortable during pregnancy, especially at the end, is so we don’t care what the hell we have to go through to get that baby out. Labor doesn’t look so bad after all! Oh, and you probably already know this, but those BH contractions are your friend; I don’t mind them at all because with all of my pregnancies I’ve been 3-4cm even before “active” labor. I also took evening primrose oil, which may have helped.


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