Ultrasound Nightmare

I walked into the little ultrasound room and sat up on the bed. The screen was facing me, which was immediately odd to me because they usually never let you see the images as they take them. The technician started scanning my abdomen and I watched the screen diligently. I didn’t see a nice, large, well defined gestational sac. Instead I saw grapes.  Grapes – small, copious numbers of little round focuses on the screen  inside my uterus. 

The technician left the room without saying anything. Quickly, she returned with the radiologist who them confirmed what I saw on the screen: a molar pregnancy. No baby – gestational trophoblast can disease – could become malignant if I don’t get rid of it right away. 

No baby.  

I got off the table and cried as I changed. 

And then I woke up. I looked at the clock on my night table as my confusion subsided: 4:06. I couldn’t help but worry about my nighare for the rest of the morning. 

When I went for my real scan, I was extra nervous. This time the screen was facing away from me and the technician clicked away, pushing unimaginably hard on my full bladder. Quiet, save for the sound of the machine snapping screen shots. Then she broke the silence: “have you ever had any surgery in your pelvis?” The probe was over my right lower quadrant. What did she see… Or not see? An ectopic pregnancy, or maybe just an elusive appendix.  I told her that I had my appendix taken out. She was satisfied. 

Eventually we changed over to the endovaginal scan. As I got up to use the washroom and take off my underwear, I sneaked a look at the monitor: a gestational sac – no grapes. But nothing else. 

More scanning in silence. I saw her scrawl the little ball backwards, which is what I do when I’m checking for a heart rate: Thats’s a good sign, right?  Eventually she was done and she went to talk to the radiologist. I sat on the corner of the bed watching the same shift loop play on the screen: an intrauterine gestational sac with a tiny fetal pole and an even smaller yolk sac. I resisted the urge to scroll through the other images on the screen – no control. 

The technician returned to the room alone. She told me that everything looked good and she offered to show me some pictures. She showed me the yolk sac and the fetal pole inside the gestational sac inside my uterus. 

No bad dreams. 

“Did you find a fetal heart rate,” I asked? 

“Yes. About 119.”

28 thoughts on “Ultrasound Nightmare

      • But someone I heard of is doing a project of sorts looking at heart rate and gender and I think the idea was that if you had a low heart rate and a male baby, you didn’t have to be as worried.


      • I tried to reply directly to your comment about the research project, but there wasn’t a reply option, so I’m replying up here…..

        So what do you mean that you don’t have to worry if it’s a low heart rate and a boy? Should I be worried if the heart rate was higher?

        Do you think caffeine could cause the baby’s heart rate to increase? I drank a cup of coffee about twenty minutes before my first US, and baby’s HR was 160.

        (Also, I just looked back at both my kids’ OB records. My son’s HR was always between 140 and 150. My daughter’s HR was usually in the 140s and 150s, although once it was 130 and once it was 170.)

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oh, I think just from a medical providers point of view… When a baby’s heart rate is below 110, we start to get a little antsy – so they are proposing that since it could be a normal heart rate in a boy baby, maybe we shouldn’t worry so much!
        I’m glad to hear that there was really no difference between the heart rates of your babies. I have no frame o reference, seeing as how both my kids are boys!


      • Oh okay, that makes sense then.

        I guess my daughter’s HR was arguably a bit higher overall than my son’s. Agh. I’m just trying not to stress since this one’s was 160. I’m hoping it was the coffee. πŸ˜‰

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Aww… you are the proud incubator of a sweet little pole bean… lol ! =) SO HAPPY that it turned out well, and could seriously kick you for the scare you gave us… but only a small nudge, don’t wanna disturb the sweet pea ! =)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I saw your ultrasound picture post before this one, so I knew all was well, but I do have to say you executed that very well. It was like a Grey’s Anatomy episode. πŸ™‚ Glad everything is good!

    Liked by 1 person

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