Yet bigger than I can handle. 

Is this really what I want?



I am raw,

With worry – Inside.

It grows,

This feeling. 

Raw – with sadness,

It overflows,

And I can’t contain. 

Everything inside of me. 


7 thoughts on “Inside

  1. This is beautiful, simply wonderful… =)

    You seem to be a whirling dervish of confusion right now, as well as possibility… I hear you.

    Even though I am not currently with child, thanking ALL that is holy for a moment, I can relate on some level, and understand the weight of a HUGE decision pressing down on my psyche. All I can say is that we made our decisions, and we have no idea what will come of them, but they were OURS to make, and we did that. With bells on, apparently… =)

    Have a beautiful day and I hope that you get some clarity and peace soon…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes… this was my decision to make – no doubt about that. I wish I could go back and experience the thoughts and feelings I had way back when I thought this was a good idea. Hopefully they will come back to me soon


  2. A wonderful thing about life, is that it’s always changing, and when it’s scary or hard, it can only get better. It doesn’t stay bad forever unless you want it to.
    What do you want? Peace, happiness, purpose? Think big picture, not specifics. One day this small thing will be a long way behind you and you will have learned something because of it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Juli, you are right (as always). I am feeling so exhausted and beat down right now and like I have no control over anything (not just the pregnancy). I don’t feel the same excitement that I felt before – now I just freak out and wonder what I’ve gotten myself into everytime I deliver someone else’s baby. Yikes! I’m not ready for that to happen in 7 months!


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